workplace flexibility

I watched an amazing forum on workplace flexibility streaming live from the White House today. www.workplaceflexibility2010.org. I am so impressed with the Obamas that they have made this a priority. Mrs. Obama talked very openly about how important this was for her and why she put together this special group of leaders to make working an easier thing for parents and family members. Two working parents is quickly becoming a necessity for so many families - and if you are a single working parent flexibility is a MUST. And it isn't all about parent/child relationships - although that is the biggest motivator behind this - it also talked about caring for elderly parents and special needs family members.
Now more than ever I wish I had a job that had more flexibility. As i think more about it however i realize that i just want less work. I asked about working less and the response was something about restructuring my compensation (aka get paid less). i wonder if i just up and quit if they would beg me to stay and i could "restructure" on my terms. I guess i would have to be serious about not having a job because around here "we are lucky to have our jobs." (at least that is what we are told at least weekly).
When is someone going to knock on my door and offer me a new job (in NC!) that makes a decent amount of money and gives me the opportunity to be with my boys more? oh yeah, and offer to buy my house from me? that happens doesn't it?

Cooper 3.5 months

Serious heat rash. I've been keeping him bundled too tight and too warm. He spent a good part of yesterday in just a diaper and he seems to be doing much better and the welts are calming down. You aren't supposed to put any lotion on prickly heat.

He is sleeping in his crib, still swaddled but loosely. He sleeps well. Even sleeping from 10-6:30 on Saturday night.

I need to start getting him out of the swaddler.

He is starting to roll.

good things

Ore-Ida now makes sweet potato french fries. They are good and you can get them in the regular freezer section.

Covergirl & Olay Simply Ageless foundation. I'm not a big fan of makeup and/or foundation and usually just wear a tinted moisturizer but this stuff i really like. It blends really well and keeps my face soft and doesn't look like i have a ton of makeup on.

oh geez

Looking back on today i'm not sure if i should turn myself into CPS or be proud i'm still here. A lesser mother would have headed for the hills hours ago! Today was just one of those days where you feel a challenge at every turn.

We woke up to Cooper skin on fire once again. His belly, face and arms were covered in a rash, welts, blisters, scabs. He just has this skin that can't handle much change. The last time i gave him a bath and put lotion on him (Aveeno calming/sensitive) he broke out like this too but i didn't think it was that lotion because it is made for sensitive baby skin. He seemed rather uncomfortable all day and i'm actually pretty concerned about his skin - especially the scabby parts on his arm and back. I've decided not to bathe him anymore and wont be using a lick of soap or body wash and i'm not sure if i will even put lotion on him anymore but just in case i bought some very expensive stuff from Whole Foods and some pure jojoba oil that might work. Still probably the best thing for him is to just let his natural boday oils take over.

I decided in the morning that it would be a dummy-free day for Cash - which is a good idea and i stand behind it. and actually we did really well. in the morning i told Cash that we weren't going to be able to have his dummy all day and he could have it when he takes a nap and goes to bed but nothing else. So we headed out and only twice did he ask to have it all day! i was very proud of him. although this came with a very strange side effect - Cash was sucking his finger and thumb today which is something that he has NEVER done. in order to keep him from wanting his dummy we kept him very busy and headed off to the Bonnie Springs petting zoo.

At the petting zoo Cash was interested but scared at the same time. He kept telling me that it was too scary to touch the animals. We had a nice time but Cash fell down and scraped his knee when Chandler was trying to take a picture of me infront of the buffalo. we weren't paying attention.

We went to lunch after which was uneventful. Cash fell asleep in the car on the way home and when we got home he took a long nap. But during that time we had to try to keep Cooper calm and I had a bunch of things to do. So i headed off to run errands. We are planning to have the Martins Sr. and their friends over for Easter so i had to go and get some things so we'd be prepared - seeing as how next week I go back to work and wont have time to get out during the week. So i was off to Target, World Market and the grocery store. I got some more lotion for Cooper and some Easter treats for Cash's friends at daycare.

When I got home Cash and Chandler took off to Home Depot but when they got home things went down hill quickly. Cash was playing outside and got wet in the sprinklers so he took his shorts off, then he said that his diaper was wet and he took it off too. Since i didn't want him standing naked in the middle of the street i opened the back of the car to do a diaper change in the back-back but it was full of stuff so i pushed the automatic close button and walked away. At that moment Cash put his hand in the back and the door closed on his little fingers. Oh my the screaming was so sad. the car has a sensor but his hand was too little to stop and reverse the door. Chandler grabbed Cooper from where he was sitting and we all ran inside for some ice. did i mention that when i was opening the back to get Cash's fingers out i bonked him in the head? Chandler put Cooper in his carseat which was on the chair. This seemed like a good place to put him since Cooper can practically stand up and walk now; he has been rolling and pushing off with his feet and cannot be trusted on any elevated or uneven surface. So we are putting ice on Cash and get distracted with him for a few minutes when i look over and see Cooper squirming all the way up and over his carseat and is practically dangling off the side of the chair - oh lord call the cops now! he was seconds from rolling out.

3 loads of laundry (4 if you count an extra rinse cycle for the baby clothes) later, half a workout, dinner and picking up after the boys i am not feeling so great about today but we got through it.

cash says:

While riding his bike through the house:
Cash: I'm going off to work.
Daddy: Oh really? where do you work.
Cash: (very mater of factly) Sam's Club

While helping mommy cook dinner:
Mommy: Thanks for slicing the cheese love-bucket
Cash: Cash is not your love-bucket. I'm your lovebug! (its true!)

Every morning when Cash gets up he knocks on his door to let us know he is ready to get up. Most mornings he says, "knock knock, Cash Robert Martin here."

This morning Chandler picked out his clothes and was carrying them downstairs when Cash said, "I no like those clothes" and he took them out of Chandler's hands and threw them up on the counter. He really likes his construction pajamas and would wear them all the time if we let him. 

He had 2 very nice baby sitters the other night while Chandler and I went and met with our tax preparer. He referred to them as the blue girl and the orange girl (hmmm?) We so rarely have a babysitter I was nervous how he would do but he warmed up rather quickly and was very entertaining. The blue girl even remarked that "Cash never stops talking!"

The blue girl is a teacher and literacy specialist so it was nice to hear that she thinks Cash is smart and has a long attention span. And that he is on the second stage of writing (something having to do with drawing larger circles). 

Sylvia also recently told me that Cash has the best manners than anyone else at daycare! that's my boy!!

He absolutely LOVES Elmo bikes right now - he will watch the whole thing over and over and gets so excited to see the unicycle. He talks about the whole show and asks and answers questions with Elmo. 

Cash blows me away when he speaks in complete sentences. Like right now, he is eating his breakfast and Slider is begging. He said, "go away Chachi, this is my breakfast." And when you ask him a question he will repeat the question before he answers.  He is so cool! 

Cooper's big night out

Recently Cooper has been needing a little more real estate. He would always wake up in the morning with his face pressed against the rungs of his bassinet. So last night I moved him into his crib. He did great! His normal routine is that we go upstairs at 9:30 or 10pm, he gets changed, wrapped up and fed and then put into his bassinet. Last night we put him in his crib and he woke up at 4:30am to have a little snack and then back to sleep. I got him up at 6:30 (after mommy was showered and dressed!) for the day. 

He is such a good baby. He is definitely a lover and smiles and laughs all the time. I don't remember Cash laughing so much. He just sits back and watches Cash rule the roost. He is having a good time at Sylvia's and we are all adjusting well. I'm going back to work full time next week. 

Comin' in hot

Cash learned today that he cannot ride his bike down the stairs. Good thing our stairs are carpeted and separated by landings.

Springtime in the desert

the best and the worst

3 months old is the worst! its when you realize that your little, tiny, new born baby is no longer that. your 3 month old can interract with you. he can talk and laugh and smile and giggle. he doesn't need that neck pillow in his car seat anymore and he can use the stroller sitting up instead of lying down. he can hold his head up and can almost roll over. and after rolling over is sitting and after sitting is crawling and then its really all over - the pudgy, helpless little baby is gone.

But that's the best! i love this age and all the ages before and after.

Happy St. Patrick's Day

Cashel RobertcO'oper James

Just for reference: 2 years ago Cashel

Cash at 2 years & 2 months

Cash's vocabulary and conversational skills are just amazing to me. he can carry on full conversations and describe his feelings. He is great at reading books to us and LOVES the Duck and Goose series. I really like those books too because they really seem to be teaching him about things like patience ("what does patience mean Cash?" "it means you have to wait for the snail.") and frustrated ("goose is frustrated because his tower fell down"). He's such a joy!
He gets upset with us sometimes and it seems that he chooses to spit and squeal at the top of his lungs when he gets mad. But he usually calms down rather quickly.
Lately he has wanted a bottle when Cooper gets a bottle but that doesn't worry me too much. We are still talking about using the toilet and hope that this spring we'll tackle the potty.

tour d' trucks

Taking Cash to school each morning is like a lesson in trucks. My boy LOVES trucks - well all things with wheels actually. He can point out a moving vehichle, by its proper name at 100 yards. He is a bit of a savant that way. On any given morning he will point out the following:
cement truck
big truck
tractor
little tractor (a gator or something like it)
gas truck
dump truck
choo choo train
bike/bicycle
fire engine
motorcycle
steam roller

this morning we spent a good 15 minutes watching some workers pour the cement foundation to a house. it was completely facinating to Cash.

what a difference a week makes

Last week i put Cooper on his belly for "tummy time" but as usual we didn't have too much success and he complained most of the time. he's got a strong neck and when we hold him he holds his head straigh up with no problem but could never really get comfortable when he was on his tummy. Well today i tried again and he is like a little champ and he was totally comfortable on his belly, holding his head up at a 90% angle - just like the books says he would do at 3 months!!

Cooper 3 months

Cooper had to go to the doctor today for a nasty rash. He is fine, just something that a guy with sensitive skin is going to have to deal with. He also scratched his eye over the weekend so we had that looked at. He got his eye stained and then we used a black light to look into his eye. He has a scratch on his cornea* that we will put some ointment on. Although, as we realized once we were at the pharmacy, the office gave us a prescription for the wrong kid so i'll have to wait til tomorrow to get it filled. 

Cooper weighs 14lb 7oz at 3 months. 

*originally i said iris but i was wrong, i meant cornea - the iris is behind the eye, the cornia is on the outside.

food, fat and a couple tips

Lets start with the tips.
I admit it, i am fighting a losing battle with the boys and their veggies. The closest Chandler comes to vegetables is when he has to walk through the produce section of the grocery store to get to the bacon! And because no one likes green things i slack off and don't even make them for most meals. i do things like fajitas that have onions and peppers in the mix but Chandler and Cash can eat around them. and that doesn't help anyone. So, the new rule is: Vegetables at every dinner. My hope is that they get so tired of seeing them on their plates they'll just eat them. Its not always easy to keep fresh produce in the house but that is the goal. Just in case i find myself with only fuzzy greenbeans or soggy broccoli in the fridge - and so there is no excuse - i've stocked a couple bags of Birdseye Steamers in the freezer. In a pinch (3mins) they can be steamed up in the microwave. they are a really great thing to have in my back pocket. Although, if you are going to try this i suggest taking about 30seconds to 1 minute off the cooking time since they seemed a little over cooked if you follow the directions.
The other fantastic discovery i found at the store was Thomas' Bagel Thins. I love bagels. I'm not sure if i love them because i love the carbs or if i love the butter that i get to drown them in but regardless, these bagel thins are a really good thing. Basically they kept the top and bottom but cut out the middle. They are only 110 calories and i feel a lot better about putting butter on them but i bet if you used peanut butter they'd be even better.
Lastly, Special K has new granola which is really, really good. Put it in yogurt and you've got a nice little treat. Even Cash likes this.

ok, so Chandler and I have decided it is time to lose the baby fat. Its good that this coincides with Daylight Savings since we will have to do any working out pretty early in the mornings since the boys take up a lot of time and attention when they are awake. and we are usually so tired by the end of the day that there's no chance we are doing any working out in the evenings. It will be a lot easier to get up if the sun is shining. Emily is doing a good job but i'm not ready to post any weights - althought that would make me more accountable!

two times

Cash is really into everything being two times. He will say that he slept on the floor - two times. He'll say he tooted - two times. He also says that everyone is two.

2 months and 3 weeks and 5 days...and counting

Cooper slept from 10pm to 5:30am. He ate a bottle and went back to sleep for the rest of the morning until we all were ready for the day.
He doesn't like his dummy like Cash does. He'll take it and it will help to calm him but doesn't keep it in for very long and he cannot sleep with it in his mouth. I'll put him in the crib with it in his mouth and about 2 minutes later i'll hear him spit it out.
Cooper doesn't do very well with tummy time but he does have a strong neck and holds his head up when you hold him over your shoulder.
We've started laying him on the play mat and he seems to really enjoy it. especially when his big brother lies down to play with him.
Also, it looks like his gunky eye is on the way to clearing up. I don't have to clean it out at all lately and he just gets small eye boogers now instead of huge green ones.
He is a very good, calm and loving baby.

how do i explain...

Cash is having a lot of new experience lately and sometimes they are a little tricky to explain. Like tonight, we put Cash to bed happily and easily and about an hour later he wakes up crying and screaming, "owwwww" "hurrrrt". I ran upstairs and Cash, who was really still asleep, was holding a limp arm up saying, "owww." I am assuming his hand fell asleep because he way laying on it and now he has pins and needles. I asked him if it tingled but who knows if Cash understands what 'tingling' feels like. He said yes and then laid back down and fell back to sleep. Obviously he's moved on but it leaves me thinking...how do you explain these sorts of changes. I somewhat remember having pins and needles when I was small but don't remember any details about it so i guess i survived. I remember having growing pains a lot so i'm on the look out for that with Cash but again, don't know how i'll explain it to him without freaking him out - i'll probably start with something about him getting taller and see where it takes us.

Most importantly I want him to know that his mommy and daddy are here to protect him and even though these things might be scary and hurt we wouldn't let anything bad happen to him. That seemed to get him through his bad dreams so hopefully it will calm his fears about other things as well.

boys vs. girls

Cash is really good at recognizing a boy vs. a girl - for example, he will say mommy is a girl and daddy is a boy. Also, he can recognize the difference between a girl (a young female) and a lady (an older female) and the same for boy or man. Sometimes if the person is questionable he will get it wrong but you'd forgive him if you saw the kind of people i am talking about. My favorite is when he calls people "guys". Like, "Whatcha doin' guys?" or "what's that guy doing?"

However, he doesn't always sort things out into neat little male/female buckets. Like this morning when Chandler was going to take a shower and walked into the bathroom with his boxers on. Cash yelled, "Daddy, take off your panties." It was pretty hysterical.

loving brothers

I was just telling Chandler yesterday that we are really lucky that Cash loves Cooper so much. There has never been an ounce of jealousy or agression toward cooper and Cash will, out of the blue, tell Cooper that he loves him. It is really sweet.
For example, this morning we were sitting in the bed and I was burping Cooper and Cash said, "NO MOMMY, don't hurt Cooper." I tried to explain that i was just help him get his burps out but he was really upset that it looked like i was spanking Cooper. "Stop hurting Cooper," so i had to just rub Cooper's back instead.

Cash also calls Cooper "super dooper" sometimes - i guess a nickname is emerging. Also, he'll call the dog "chacharini". I assume he gets this stuff from Chandler .

he gets that from me

Last night Cash woke up crying. He said he had a dream and that "the monkey scared me." I asked him a little about this and he said the monkey was fighting with the dinosaur.
That is so sad because its hard to explain about dreams to a little guy - but i tried so lets hope it sticks.

What am i gonna do with this guy?

in the course of one car ride...

Cash: "I eat the boogies."
Me: "You shouldn't do that. What do they taste like?"
Cash: "Hot dogs."

Cash: "Look at that school bus. (it was actually an RV with a small truck towed behind). That school bus has a truck. That's so funny."

Cash: "Look at that car. (a jeep with a bicycle rack and a bicycle on the back). That car has a bike on it. That's so funny."

Cash climbed up the mountain at the park today. he climbed all the way up by himself and only needed Chandler to carry him on the really steep parts on the way down. He really liked the little house at the top. We didnt veture too far but maybe next time we'll go even higher to the next peak.

Beautiful - like a girl

Today our neighbor Jimmy came over to tell me something (i'll get to that later). Jimmy is the neighbor who Cash idolizes from a safe distance. Although last weekend Cash did spend a good amount of time running in and out of Jimmy's garage and sitting on his 4 wheeler so maybe he's getting over his shyness. Jimmy's truck and motorcycle is the topic of many conversations with young Cash. Jimmy has only seen Cooper from a distance or while he's been sleeping in the carseat but today I was holding him while we talked at the door. Jimmy really likes little boys - he has a grown son and always tells me stories of when his son was little and how much he really enjoyed being a father to a son. Anyway, Jimmy was blown away with how "beautiful" Cooper is. He kept remarking how pretty he is and how good looking he is. He said, "Wow, he's beautiful, like a girl. That's just great!" I don't get offended when people say that. In fact, Jimmy isn't the first to say it - just last night my friend Dana told me that Cooper could be a girl he is so gorgeous! What i find totally interesting is that people said the same thing about Cash when he was a baby. I remember distinctly the first person to say that about Cash was a woman in my office. I remember being taken aback when I first heard it but then after multiple people said the same thing I thought, well, he must really be pretty!

On a different note, the reason Jimmy came over was to show me the most awful looking creature that he captured in his garage. it is some terrible hybrid between a centipede and a scorpion. He worries about us with the boys so he wants to make sure that if we see this nasty thing we will stay away!!

my eyes adore you

oh no! Last night i was looking into Cash's eyes as we were having dinner (sidenote: last night Cash wanted to be fed while he laid on the couch - too funny). I noticed that his eyes have totally changed. Over the past 6 months they've been less of the bright blue that they've been since he was born but still blue. Last night his eyes looks exactly like Chandlers. They are sort of teal green with blue specks. We will see where they end up.

a few things that bother me

1. The air traffic controller who let his kid go to work with him. LEAVE THIS GUY (and his kid) ALONE. I think its great that this dad took his kid to work. He is teaching very valuable lessons to his boy about working and being in a workplace. The kid wasn't messing around. It sounded like he was behaving and doing exactly what any adult would have done. I think everyone is making way too big of a deal out of this.

2. Yesterday i watched A Baby Story on TV and a little boy was born without fingers on his left hand. There was a very sad realization after the baby came out that something was wrong when they thought they would have a perfect little baby. Even sadder is the granddad, beaming ear to ear when he was talking about how much he loves Yankees baseball and he was so excited to play catch with his grandson-to-be. Anway, the fact that the baby didn't have fingers on his left hand wasn't picked up on any ultrasound and was a complete shock and surprise to everyone. The doctor then made all sorts of excuses why it wasn't picked up on the ultrasounds. Take it from someone who was scanned within an inch of her sanity - there is a reason they do that big one where they count all the fingers and toes and its to make sure the baby has all it's fingers and toes. Turns out they blamed it on compression and the fact that the baby was laying on the hand during developement and therefore the fingers didn't form. I'm not sure i believe that, but ok. I wonder if that was the case is there anything they could have done about it while the baby was in utero. Regardless, the doctor should have said she was sorry, don't just blame the baby. I am very thankful for my perfect little boys and nephews. And my doctors who fretted to make sure my guys were healthy.

3. I'm back at work a few days a week and there are still no accomodations for pumping. no surprise there. I've decided that i refuse to walk to another building and up 16 floors to a room with no lights, so i stand in one bathroom in our office and make everyone else wait until i'm done. I hope the noise from my pump isn't too annoying for everyone. Anyway, i've started a trend because now there are 2 more mommies and 1 (possibly 2) on the way. Although one's a formula baby and the other has a full-time, live-in nanny so we aren't talking apples to apples here. Oh well, i don't care. I've got so much milk in my freezer we'll be sending Cooper to college with mommy's milk!

4. Nevada's governor and education system - 'nuf said. i wont be sending my kids to school in this state!!

People will put anything on Craigslist

I've been trolling craigslist lately just to make sure i have every last "baby thing" i could possibly have. And let me tell you, i don't want what they're selling. Yuck. Sometimes I think people buy things just to resell them and I can't help but think some of the things are stollen. Why would i buy a baby/infant/pet bathtub (that's exactly how the description read) from you for $8 when I could get it new - without your (or your dog's) DNA all over it - for $10? i'll waste the $2 in gas getting to your house! Alright, so I was considering a double stroller but i don't think so. Where would i keep it and when do I actually think Cash would sit still enough to ride in it? but i keep looking in case someone is giving away one of the Rolls Royce types for free - hey, if i don't use it i can turn around and sell it!!
Anyway, i think when i'm finally done with all my baby & kid stuff (not yet!) i'll have to set up a little in-home business to get rid of it all. I can probably make a little extra dough for the boys' braces or something. That's another good reason to have your kids in relatively short order - otherwise you're stuck with a sea of plastic toys and mess for years on top of years.

Cooper's 11th week

Cooper is so cute and such a great baby. I am enjoying him so much that it makes me feel bad I was struggling with him in the early weeks. he is really mild tempered and doesn't cry (unless he is really, really hungry). He will whimper a little when he is getting hungry and gives me plenty of notice to get his bottle ready. He squirms when he has a dirty diaper and much prefers to have clean, dry pants - always (but who doesn't).
He sleeps well now. His normal routine is to eat - a bottle for food and nursing for fun - and fall asleep around 7 or 7:30pm (which is good because that is Cash's bedtime so everyone is on the same schedule), I'll take him upstairs with me around 9:30-10pm, change him, swaddle him and feed him again then put him into the bassinet. He'll normally sleep until 2:30-3am and then wake for a quick feeding and then sleep on until 5-6am. Last night he actually slept from 10pm to 5am which was cool but always makes me wake up in a panic. He then spends an hour after he wakes up stretching and tooting out all the bubbles he collected during the night. he can toot like no ones business. But he no longer grunts and squeeks all night and Chandler has come back to sleep in our room now!!
The pleasant-ness that is Cooper is all attributed to his gut. A gassy baby is not a fun baby. As soon as Cooper started tooting and pooping easily and regularly he became a happy baby and so easy. The downside to this is that he poops so much! he routinely has blow outs and stains his clothes but he does it all with a smile.
I haven't figured out daytime naps yet but that seems like something that just fell into place with Cash so i'm not going to force the issue. Sylvia and Cooper will work it out together.
Cooper goes to Sylvia's 2 days a week while i go to work and so far, so good. She says he's really smart because he 'coos' all the time and watches the other kids play. She just loves my boys! I'm glad that he is going to daycare. Say what you will but i think it is a good thing that my kids go to Sylvia's/daycare and I go to work (i have to say that because i have no choice and have to work).

bottom line: Cooper rocks. Cash is awesome. Yay Martins!